Entry Level

So in my web surfing one day I happened upon a literary website that has an annual contest for writers to submit very short written entries. By short I mean that the suggested limit is 50 words or less. Wow. Not much you can say in that short of wordage (is wordage a word?). Right up my alley I think. Even when I read the criteria it seems to be for me.

Every year they field thousands of submissions based only on the standard rules that have been applied since 1983 if my research is correct. There are minimal rules.

To quote from the website:

The Bulwer-Lytton fiction contest challenges entrants to compose the opening sentence to the worst possible novels.

Each entry must consist of a single sentence but you may submit as many entries as you wish.

A single sentence? Challenge accepted. Holy crap. Right up my alley right? My only issue is the whole 50 words thing. Pffffft. But I digress. So going over the 50 word rule here is my entry that I feel could not have happened with only 50 words. And yes, I submitted it anyway. I think this works.

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Looking up from the bottom of the stairs it would appear that Petunia, somehow finding a box big enough for her svelte 425 pounds, had been deflected, no, careened,  back and forth off of every rail and stanchion that was available on the way down, left a plethora of cardboard shrapnel on pretty much every stair possible, while doing her best impression of a jelly filled spandex avalanche, proudly announced megaphone like, with a single gulp of air as she presented herself splayed at the bottom almost breathless and totally exhilarated, “Oh my god, holy crap that was loud, haven’t done that in years, is everybody else ok?”

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Please comment below on…well…your opinion. Thanks.