Friday, December 29, 2023

My Year In Review

 

My Year In Review

Once again it’s that time of year where most of us reflect on what we did not accomplish over the past year and wonder why. It’s that week between Christmas and New Year (no “s” because there is only one) where we lose track of what day it is, forget to eat healthy, neglect personal hygiene a little, fail to change out of our track pants, and attempt to pry your butt off of the couch where we have been binge watching anything that looks good at that time.

Admit it. We all do it. You do so. I’m guilty as well. I binge watched couple of TV series in track pants.

In my own reflection, I look back on a challenging year. Since undergoing a major brain surgery in late September 2022, I have had many hurdles to overcome, and I am still not back to where I was prior to that. You could actually say that I’m not right in the head, and you wouldn’t be too far off.

I really do understand that there a lot of people in this world that endure hardships much worse and more often than mine. I truly feel for them and hope that they have the strength to endure. I do not wish to seem unsympathetic, but I can only speak for my own situation.

As I sit here writing this and looking back, I can honestly say that I have done what I can to remove myself from most of the negative people and relationships in my life. And I am the better for it. There is still a ton more work to do.

I have been pushing myself through my recovery because I’m a stubborn prick and cannot endure the feeling of being feeble. I need to do what I can to try to get back to normal.

The way that I explain it to people is that it’s like being a toddler. And a child takes quite some time to learn basic motor skills we all take for granted. Yes a toddler. Immediately after my surgery, I could not walk, could barely talk, could only see very blurred vision, and my dexterity was almost non-existent. So I have equated it to this. Much like a small child learning all of these things for the first time, I am doing pretty much the same thing. The only difference being is that I’ve done all of these things before, I know how they’re supposed to work, but am unable to function as I should. So my frustration gets in the way quite a bit.

All of this aside, I feel rather fortunate to be where I am today and am looking forward to where my snail pace recovery will take me.

I’m alive. From the life I’ve led and the things I have put myself through, I shouldn’t be alive, and consider myself fortunate. I guess me writing this was the much needed reminder of that very fact that I needed. I hope that you find yours.

I have a feeling that I’m going to make 2024 a much improve year for myself.

My apologies for taking so long to get back to this.